When somebody says to me “don’t hold your breath” i tell them “i am a swimmer; its what i do to win the race”

I want to rewrite an entire stoner album, replacing all marijuana references with math references.  

You got your problems. I have my Calculus 3 final tomorrow. Come on and kick me.

Dear Parents of my age group,

You are the reason why your daughter is a whore (in case you were wondering). 

Remember back when your children were in middle school and you planned everything for them? Right, that is why everyone in my age group finds dating to be a waste of time.  If its not productive don’t do it right? Well everyone wants to have sex - which is normal - but today, people have sex with strangers rather than people they have gotten to know better.

 ”Today’s college kids are the first generation to have had their entire childhoods scheduled. To them, dating is simply not a productive use of time.” ~ USA Today

I remember back in middle school, when I wanted to do something my parents did not stop me. It was like being independent (but they still payed for my meals). When I spoke to other kids and asked them to do fun stuff or whatever there parents never let them. I thought it was fucked up. Especially parents of girls. You raised your daughter uses her mouth for things it was not intended for.

I hate this generation,
~Skandi 

P.S. I love you mom and dad for being better than this screwed up generation.

Duly noted: Keep a knife in your shower.

Who will you die with?